Common Courtesy: The Forgotten Manner

One trend I’m seeing among the teenage group these days is the utter lack of respect for anyone around them in public venues. Perhaps it is simply my own age finally beginning to show, much to the delight of my wife…I’m sure…who has been hoping that I would grow up one day.

Regardless of whether or not I’m becoming a grumpy old man at the ripe age of 33 or not isn’t really the point here. The point is one of Common Courtesy. A behavioral benchmark that is supposed to be taught by parents to their children in order to instill a sense of respect for other people’s property, time and environment. Taking other people’s valuable time and efforts into mind before selfishly acting like a showoff or a nitwit seems to be an alien concept these days.

The more rudely and obnoxious the kids can be, the more cool they seem to believe their behavior to be. The scornful glares they receive as a result of their actions never seem to deter their motivations for a repeat performance. Perhaps it is the chastising glances that mark their success? It is unsure.

Recently, I took my family to enjoy a showing of “The Nativity”. It is a modern movie based upon the events leading up to and involving the birth of Jesus Christ in Bethlehem. The story, itself, is awe-inspiring. The movie is a wonderful production. But it would have been a much more enjoyable viewing, had not a gaggle of giggling adolescents seen fit to show up approximately 1 minute before the movie began.

Talking obnoxiously loud, climbing over seats directly behind us, bumping our chairs, passing crackling candy papers and boxes, blipping their cellphones, whispering smartass comments about various situations within the movie. And, finally, culminating in an utterly distasteful and haphazardous attempt of “applause” upon the birth of Jesus in the manger. I mean, honestly… have they no couth whatsoever?

My wife tried to explain away their rude behavior by insisting that in some youth ministries, it is encouraged to clap for spiritually beneficial matters. However, this all goes back to the whole “common courtesy” issue with regards to behavioral modification. The movie was not a football game, nor a rock concert. An emotionally moving depiction of the birth of our Lord and Savior should not be rewarded by two teenaged boys muttering out a half-hearted “wooooo” and clapping like a pair of sealions at SeaWorld.

It is this lack of respect for the dignity of the subject matter presented, coupled with their exhibition of self-gratutitive clowning that truly upsets my sensibilities. It is NOT too much to ask for some common courtesy and respect for others in the theater. If you have been a party to this type of behavior in the past, or know of those who engage in it for the purpose of cheap thrills and low-grade humor… please stop it.

If you persist in this type of behavior while I’m seated nearby… don’t be surprised if you end up leaving the theater with a bucket of oily, buttered popcorn crammed down over the top of your head.

Ok folks, I guess it’s time to throw out a few more rants about things that annoy the crap outta me. Today’s hodge-podge medley starts off with… “Cultural Blackmail”. Then we’ll explore the absurd phenomenon I like to call “Winter Festival”.

Cultural Blackmail –
I have a theory about something that we all seem to find ourselves victim of. I like to call it cultural blackmail because it seems as tho the powers-that-be like to saturate our entertainment, our marketing and our products with trends and views that not all of us share. They shove an idea down our throats everywhere we turn until we’re so sick and tired of being annoyed and offended by it… that we hopelessly give in and accept it as “normal”. Let me illustrate this…

Up until about a year or two ago, products that are internationally delivered came with multi-lingual instructions. It wasn’t uncommon to find French, German, Spanish, English, Chinese, Japanese and Korean languages in the boxes. This is marketably understandable, citing the fact that these products are used around the world and need to include instructions in local languages. However, it seems to be the new market trend here in the United States to use two languages in 9/10ths of products we see and buy each day. English and Spanish are splayed over everything we watch, see, touch, use or consume. It’s offensive and intrusive to the American culture!!

Oh I know there are those out there who would get all indignant over this viewpoint and call me racially or culturally biased. But, before you label me and file me away in your little box of evil people… let me expound on this subject a bit. You might begin to see my reasoning. I’m of the opinion that each and every country ought to have a primary (or “official”) language. The inclusion of other languages within its society is understandable and necessary for several reasons. But each country ought to be recognized for a main dialect. The United States has been and continues to be a predominantly English speaking society. In fact, most of the world has adopted English as the “common denominator” language. They typically teach it in addition to their own.

The United States is about the only country in the world where we’re trying to force-encorporate Spanish into our society as an additional “official language”. Look on TV and you’ll see channels specifically designed for Latino viewers. Go to the store and nearly every single package you pick up will have a Spanish version of the labeling. Go to a restaurant, and there it is again in small print just below the English wording. Go to any public restroom and they have Spanish instructions on safety procedure signs.

Why are we, as a country, catering to this crap? Children’s shows… musical influences… common terminology… even toys, are being altered to force-feed the acceptance of either the Spanish language or Latino culture into our predominantly English speaking and culturally established society. Granted…yes… we are a “melting pot” of cultures. I won’t argue that. Most of us are genetic “mutts” if you will, coming from several lines of culture and/or races. Our diversity is beautiful.

But, there are many other races, creeds, colors, cultures and languages that are found in the United States. Where are all of the Japanese terms? Where are the Chinese warning signs in the restrooms? Where are the German food label translations in the menus at restaurants? Aren’t there German-Americans in the United States who need linguistic translations? No? Why? Oh… because they learned English. Because their families came over from Germany or Japan or China or Korea or wherever, and wanted to become Americans. Because they learned the language that Americans speak… English.

So, why is Spanish being plastered all over everything we see, hear, touch, eat, drink or use? Because we’ve become complacent as a nation to the plague of illegal immigration into this country from Mexico. The illegals don’t give a damn about learning to speak English. They want the jobs we don’t like to do and they want to earn as much money as possible without paying a dime in taxes. They use public sympathy about their financial hardships in Mexico to gain a foothold in America, and then play upon our sensibilities to have us adapt to THEIR language, instead of the other way around.

Don’t get me wrong here… I love Mexican culture. Mexican food is awesome. Mexican music is catchy and Mexican girls are very sexy. But, just because the upstanding LEGAL immigrants become Latino-Americans doesn’t make them any more special or deserving of a linguistic-acceptance-campaign than it would be for African-Americans to suddenly demand the inclusion any (or all) of the 153 known languages in Africa. And if you don’t think there are at least 153… I would like to direct your attention to the following published list:

African Languages

The main point is this: We don’t need to include Spanish on everything we interact with in the United States. In the spirit of fairness to all of our culturally diverse American citizens, we should cater to every segment of society… or cater to only one common language: English. I vote for the latter, because we’re a nation founded upon democracy. A democracy functions by the rule of the majority. It is an undeniable fact that the majority of our nation speak English.

This being said… I would like to wish our nation a Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Happy Kwanza, and Felis Navidad.

Winter Festival –
Oh my dear stars… what have we become? You’ve read my rants about this mental-masturbation we’ve come to know as Political Correctness, founded upon the ideal that we should be “culturally, racially or culturally sensitive to diverse viewpoints”. While I’m sure it was invented in the best of intentions, it has quickly grown and festered into the single biggest pussification of the American backbone that this country has ever seen!! The culmination of this atrocious behavior comes in the degridation and unsanctimonious thumbing of the nose at the most holy Christian holiday of the entire year. I speak, of course, about Christmas.

How low do we have to sink as a nation, before we finally remember that we are a nation that was founded upon freedom of speech… and freedom of religion… without fear of retaliation by our government? We have become so utterly crippled by the fear of offending our fellow man in any shape, form or fashion… that we are cowards to stand up and exercise our freedoms!! I have yet to see a Christian horde forming in the streets to assault Athiests. I have never witnessed Jews waging a media attack against them either. When is the last time you heard that any God-loving religious denomination in this nation has set about to force their religious beliefs upon those unwilling and uninterested to partake in worship? If you have, I would certainly like to hear about it.

So tell me why we are inclined to alter the way we openly celebrate this wonderful holiday season. Why are we, the God-loving majority, being forced to call “Christmas” or “Hannukah” by a new name? Has our conscience been so beaten and smothered by Political Correctness that we refuse to acknowledge our Faith upon the most important occasion of the year? Truly, there can be no sadder state of affairs within this great nation of ours. To let those who believe upon nothing and lead their lives lost to the knowledge of a loving God… dictate how we, as believers, conduct ourselves at this most joyous time of year… is heart-breaking. I, for one, respect the fact that we have freedom of religion in American. You may choose to believe as you believe. You are also free to believe in nothing. But you are NOT free to tell me that I am prohibited from displaying a nativity scene with a baby Jesus, in a public place. You are NOT free to tell me that our Jewish friends are prohibited from displaying a Menorah in a public place.

Our government was founded upon Christian principles. It’s historical fact. Men who believed in God formed a government that was intended to respect the worship of God and to stay out of the affairs of religious expression. In fact… it was well-established that this nation’s government was to be governed by a fear of God, a respect to His authority, and in ALL matters… a respect to our right to worship as we saw fit. Separation of Church and State wasn’t intended to keep Faith or God out of our government… it was intended to keep our government’s power and rule out of our Churches. If you doubt me… take a look around Washington DC. Monuments, buildings and even the etched wording upon the doorway to the United States Congress will back me up. We are one nation, under God.

God help us never to forget our basic, human rights that were given by Him... and guaranteed by the spilled blood of our forefathers. May their selfless, ultimate sacrifices never be in vain.

Hrmmm… What’s this ancient looking thing here? It’s all covered in cobwebs and dust. Let’s see… if I just wipe this off here… OH! Well would you look at that! It’s a BLOG!!! Wow… I forgot I even had this!

~LoL~ Howdy folks. Yea, it’s actually me again. I thought I would visit the old blog again and toss out some random sparks from what gray matter I possess. The main reason I haven’t been updating the blog regularly for some time now, is due to the fact that things have been going fairly well.

For the exception of some rather hurtful and regretful dialogue with an acquaintence of mine, things have been pretty smooth. We had a nice Halloween and a pleasant Thanksgiving. As always, I ate too much. And without a currently active gym membership, I’m sure my pants will remind me of that fact each morning for the foreseeable future.

My grandfather recently fell in his bedroom and broke his ankle, so he’s been in a leg brace and sitting in a wheelchair for the past week. He’s definitely a unique character. He’s 87 years old and can remember the pet pig he had at age 4… but can’t tell you who came to visit him 8 hours ago. He feels frustrated that his memory ain’t what it used to be… at least the short-term memory. But, I just keep telling him that we’ll remind him and not to worry. He still knows who pretty much everyone is. He’s still got his witty humor that he likes to pull out of the hat when you least expect it. So, the neurons are still firing… they’re just not keeping a current log of events.

I managed to climb up on the roof and hang up our icicle-lights without teetering off the edge and mortally injuring myself… so I count that as a success. I improved upon my jimmy-rigged “christmas tree” of lights out front over last year’s design. My mom found a nice hula-hoop which I’ve used as the base for the cone-shaped strands of lights. It seems to be working well. Although I may need to add another strand of lights next year to sort of “flesh-out” the shape. It still seems a tad on the sparce side to me. But, then again, I’m never satisfied with my own work. The kids like it… so I guess that’s what matters.

I’ve split up a whole mess of dried pine kindling and it’s ready for my rather small and unremarkable “fireplace”… but I still need to load up some good dry wood from over at my grandfather’s place. He’s got an entire shed of the stuff that my dad helped stock. Of course, I always call and ask permission to share in the bounty of wood (even tho we have central heat)… and they always tell me to help myself. He’s got enough wood to keep him warm for TWO winters, so there’s no danger of running low. I don’t burn all that much in my little peanut fireplace, either. It’s really more for atmosphere than heat… even tho it does put out a nice little area of toasty warmth.

We’re supposedly slated to receive a nice little frosty unplugging of Mother Nature’s nostrils on this coming Thursday. I say this because it doesn’t seem like it’s going to be much more than slightly annoying. All of us are really sick of the yo-yo temperatures around here and are ready for a commitment of WINTER to set in. At present, it’s 66 degrees with a projected high of 75 today. By Thursday, it’s supposed to… quote… “drop off sharply in temperature”. I guess we’ll wait and see.

We’re supposed to get freezing rain, sleet and snow. But they always say, “No more than 1 to 2 inches at most”. So that’s why I say it’s nothing more than Mother Nature unplugging a nostril at us. It’s hardly worth getting excited over. It will most likely be melted and gone within 24 to 48 hours anyway. Yaaaay winter. ~sigh~

My oldest boy turned 10 on November 22. He’s finally into the double-digit area. I can remember when his little hands barely wrapped around one of my fingers. Wow… time definitely flies. Now he can almost eat more than ME… and he hasn’t even gotten to 16 yet. This is scary. ~lol~

I really don’t have anymore updates, at present. You pretty well know what’s been going on since my sudden and unexplained disappearance. I’m still sitting here in this office everyday… doing what I’m asked to do and trying to stay awake until the buzzer sounds to go home. ~lol~ A desk job is rather unflattering to the waistline… but it sure beats standing out in the heat, rain or wind.

I’ll try my best to make some more entries into this thing very soon. Until then… take care. And thanks for visiting my little corner of the web.

Hello there boys n’ girls… I’m back to confound, delight and entertain you once again. Before we dive into the mental muck, I’d like to take a moment and direct your beady little eyes upwards to the dark rectangle located immediately above this entry. I’m participating in a feature that’s offered by Blogger, which enables blog publishers to post small, non-invasive promotional advertisements for various services and/or products. You are, by no means, required to click on any banner you see… but any ad you see that might interest you will gain me a small amount of revenue. As long as it doesn’t adversely detract from my page, I figure I’ll give it a try. Help a poor, disgruntled redneck out… if the notion strikes ya.

Now onto the rant at hand…

Today’s brief and misguided tour into the mire of my collective thoughts happens to center around the medical establishment. In particular, pharmaceutical companies.

“Side Effects”

George Carlin addressed this subject in one of his skits. And, while he did a very good job in conveying the overall sense of counter-promotional redundancy that’s associated with this topic, I would also like to expound on it. Why? Because I’m sure that some of you may not have been so fortunate as to have been enlightened by Mr. Carlin’s take on it.

You see… the pharmaceutical companies today are engaging in a strange practice. It typically happens when they’re not shoving new and inadequately tested medications through FDA loopholes and ending up in subsequent class-action lawsuits. While they may not have any control over this governmentally induced requirement, the whole business of producing prescription drugs is suffering from a bad case of jeering and mocking. What am I talking about? The listing of “side-effects”… that’s what.

We’ve all seen them on television. Commercials for “brand A” this or “brand b” that. They claim that their product will help treat one ailment or another, but they also rattle off a stream of side effects that may or may not afflict you, based on a test case. Test cases involve a set number of people who have similar conditions. They are divided into two groups and half are given the medication while the other half receives a placebo. No, this is not some rude and invasive medical procedure. A placebo is nothing more than a fancy-shmancy medical term for a sugar pill. None of the test case subjects know what they’re getting, so none of them can act in a predetermined way. The idea, then, is that the testers will gain an accurate knowledge of the medication’s real benefits.

However, any and all side effects reported by subjects who took the actual medication must be acknowledged and advertised. These side effects may or may not be a direct result of the medication, and in some cases have absolutely nothing to do with it. However, in an effort to collectively cover their asses and minimize testing costs… most companies will merely list any side effect reported, and be done with it. This ultimately ends up resulting in a hodge-podge list of mostly absurd, and sometimes humorous, descriptions at the end of television advertisements.

Something to the effect of: “Try GAS-MAX for upset stomach relief…. Use only as directed. Side effects may include headache, diarrhea, vomiting, nosebleed, indigestion, sneezing, hang nails, gout, acne, ear infection, cramping, insomnia and constipation. Consult your doctor if symptoms persist. Do not take if you are currently taking medications for liver disease. Women who are pregnant or may become pregnant should not take GAS-MAX as certain complications may occur. Talk with your doctor about GAS-MAX”

Now… you tell me. Would you use GAS-MAX if there were a very real possibility that you could suffer from any number of those “side effects” as direct result? And the last part is what really cracks me up. Almost every woman in America has either been pregnant…is pregnant…or could become pregnant. Citing the fact that most women are at a direct risk of becoming pregnant if they engage in an active sex life, (and with the only real guarantee against it being celibacy) listing a warning like that is rather redundant, in my opinion. Perhaps it would be more accurate to warn against its use if you're currently pregnant or intend to become pregnant.

Disclaimer: Any reference to copyrighted names, persons, places and/or trademarks in this post are purely coincidental and unintentional.

I would like to take a moment and express my apologies for removing the last post I submitted for your reading enjoyment. Upon review of its content, I felt that the sensitive subject matter might be wrongly interpreted.

For those of you who may have already viewed its contents, I sincerely hope that you have not taken a negative connotation from it. I assure you that it was intended as a positive entry and I have the greatest of respects for all races.

Some matters are extremely difficult to discuss without the potential to accidentally offend people or hurt peoples’ feelings. I hope that this has not been the case.

I will post more rants soon.

On a day of rememberance... On a day of determination.... On a day when we still stand together as a nation, grieving those whom we lost... On a day remembered 5 years later, yet seeming ever present.... I submit the following;

I found these on the internet, and was moved by both. I hope that in your time of rememberance and reflection upon a day that demonstrated the very worst and very best of humananity...that you will remember to pray for the families of the victims. Pray for our nation, as a whole. Pray that God's Will may be done in all things, and that He may exact the rightful justice and judgement upon those who would heartlessly and cruelly snuff out the lives of so many of His beloved children.

May God Bless each of you who read this... and may God Bless America.

---------------

I am a World Trade Center tower, standing tall in the
clear blue sky, feeling a violent blow in my side, and
I am a towering inferno of pain and suffering imploding upon
myself and collapsing to the ground.
May I rest in peace.

I am a terrified passenger on a hijacked airplane not knowing
where we are going or that I am riding on fuel
tanks that will be instruments of death, and
I am a worker arriving at my office not knowing that
in just a moment my future will be obliterated.
May I rest in peace.

I am a pigeon in the plaza between the two towers
eating crumbs from someone's breakfast when fire rains down on me
from the skies, and
I am a bed of flowers admired daily by thousands of
tourists now buried under five stories of rubble.
May I rest in peace.

I am a firefighter sent into dark corridors of smoke and debris on
a mission of mercy only to have it collapse around me, and
I am a rescue worker risking my life to save lives
who is very aware that I may not make it out alive.
May I rest in peace.

I am a survivor who has fled down the stairs and out of the building
to safety who knows that nothing will ever be the same in my soul again, and
I am a doctor in a hospital treating patients burned from head to toe
who knows that these horrible images will remain in my mind forever.
May I know peace.

I am a tourist in Times Square looking up at the giant TV screens
thinking I'm seeing a disaster movie as I watch the Twin Towers crash to the ground, and
I am a New York woman sending e-mails to friends and family letting them know that I am safe.
May I know peace.

I am a piece of paper that was on someone's desk this morning and
now I'm debris scattered by the wind across lower Manhattan, and
I am a stone in the graveyard at Trinity Church covered with soot from
the buildings that once stood proudly above me, death meeting death.
May I rest in peace.

I am a dog sniffing in the rubble for signs of life, doing my best to be of service, and
I am a blood donor waiting in line to make a simple but very needed contribution for the victims.
May I know peace.

I am a resident in an apartment in downtown New York
who has been forced to evacuate my home, and
I am a resident in an apartment uptown who has walked
100 blocks home in a stream of other refugees.
May I know peace.

I am a family member who has just learned that someone I love has died, and
I am a pastor who must comfort someone who has suffered a heart-breaking loss.
May I know peace.

I am a loyal American who feels violated and vows to stand behind any
military action it takes to wipe terrorists off the face of the earth, and
I am a loyal American who feels violated and worries that people who
look and sound like me are all going to be blamed for this tragedy.
May I know peace.

I am a frightened city dweller who wonders whether
I'll ever feel safe in a skyscraper again, and
I am a pilot who wonders whether there will ever
be a way to make the skies truly safe.
May I know peace.

I am the owner of a small store with five employees
that has been put out of business by this tragedy, and
I am an executive in a multinational corporation who
is concerned about the cost of doing business in a terrorized world.
May I know peace.

I am a visitor to New York City who purchases postcards
of the World Trade Center Twin Towers that are no more, and
I am a television reporter trying to put into words the terrible things I have seen.
May I know peace.

I am a boy in New Jersey waiting for a father who will never come home, and
I am a boy in a faraway country rejoicing in the streets of
my village because someone has hurt the hated Americans.
May I know peace.

I am a general talking into the microphones about how we must stop
the terrorist cowards who have perpetrated this heinous crime, and
I am an intelligence officer trying to discern how
such a thing could have happened on American soil, and
I am a city official trying to find ways to alleviate the suffering of my people.
May I know peace.

I am a terrorist whose hatred for America knows
no limit and I am willing to die to prove it, and
I am a terrorist sympathizer standing with all the
enemies of American capitalism and imperialism, and
I am a master strategist for a terrorist group who planned this abomination.
My heart is not yet capable of openness, tolerance, and loving.
May I know peace.

I am a citizen of the world glued to my television set,
fighting back my rage and despair at these horrible events, and
I am a person of faith struggling to forgive the unforgivable,
praying for the consolation of those who have lost loved ones,
calling upon the merciful beneficence of God/Yahweh/Allah/Spirit/Higher Power.
May I know peace.

I am a child of God who believes that we are
all children of God and we are all part of each other.
May we all know peace.

~ By: Vietnamese Buddhist Monk, Thich Nhat Hanh ~

"A Tribute Of Lights"

Today’s entry is not a rant. Today’s entry is about the loss of a dear friend who I've never had the honor to meet. His name is known around the world, in almost every country. And his enthusiasm for life, his dedication to the cause of wildlife conservation and the excitement he shared with us through his adventures, made him a living legend.

His name is Steve Irwin, better known as the “Crocodile Hunter”. The news of his death came by phone from a good friend of mine. I was out riding ATV’s with some friends of ours, and at first I thought it was just impossible. I just didn’t want to believe that the man who seemed impervious to nature’s perils could be gone! How in the world could a stingray put a barb exactly between Steve’s ribs and straight into his heart? That would be like… a one in a million fluke of chance!! But, my disbelief and shock soon gave way to sadness. I sat, fighting back tears as I read the official report on CNN.com…and had to take a private moment to grieve.

“Steve-O”, as he often referred to himself, has always been a part of my childrens’ lives. From the time my firstborn showed interest in TV, the Crocodile Hunter series was one of his favorite shows. The whole family would watch with amazement as Steve cheated injury and death with his lightning fast reflexes, his keen wits and his attention to not only his own safety, but that of the animal and the filmcrew as well.

He was definitely a bloke-among-blokes. And even tho I never got the opportunity to shake his hand and thank him for opening my eyes and my heart to his world of wildlife conservation, I fully intend to make it to Australia one day. And when I’m there, I hope to offer my thanks to Australia Zoo and his family. At the very least, I hope to visit his grave and offer my respects.

My prayer is that the Lord will shine His grace, love, comfort and healing down upon the Irwins and their friends. And God bless you, Steve-O. Your legacy and your work will pay homage to the mission you followed. Rest well, mate….By Crikey we miss you.

I suppose it’s time for more hate and discontent from the disgruntled redneck. I wonder if I was ever “gruntled” in the first place? Hrmm… I’ll have to ponder that later. At any rate, I have a series of rants that I’m sure will delight, confound, or confuse the hell out of each and every one of you. But, then again, that’s why you’re here…aren’t you. I’m your poison of choice. Hahaha….

And now, I present to you… the Quantum-Rant. Think of it as a value-pack.

Not While I’m Eating! – Nutrition In Schools – Participation Required

~ Not While I’m Eating! ~

This first subject may not be one of your favorites, but it has been an issue that I’m sure has annoyed the mess out of most (if not all) of us at one time or another. How many times have you come home from work, ready for an evening of supper and some television? You might be one of many families who enjoy eating a light supper while watching TV. Afterall, that’s why TV-Dinners were invented.

However, as many can attest to, there’s nothing quite so unappetizing as being forced to endure personal hygiene or sexual dysfunction advertisements while you’re trying to enjoy a meal. It’s just uncalled for. While I’m sure the manufacturers seem to feel justified in trying to present a quality product to the pubic for the purposes of bettering their quality of life… doing it in a manner that forces everyone to endure this disturbing subject matter, is another issue.

I don’t personally enjoy hearing about how one product is more absorbent than another, and how some woman’s life was made substantially better because of it. Nor do I like seeing some smiling baffoon on a golf course who is trying to convince me that his magic little pill not only made him a hit in the bedroom, but also made him a perfect golfer.

There’s a thing I like to call “Products Of Demand”. A (POD), if you will, is something that’s available to the general buying public and serves a particular purpose. However, that purpose is usually of a personal, sensitive and sometimes embarrassing nature. These products are known by common knowledge. Products like hemorrhoid treatments… lice medication… sanitary napkins… erectile dysfunction aids… personal lubricants… birth control.

POD’s like these are sought after when they’re needed. Marketing for them should revolve around the location of the product…not broadcast on national television for everyone to have to see. POD’s aren’t for everyone, and shouldn’t be marketed to everybody at once, in my opinion. Suppertime would be a lot more enjoyable if we didn’t have the hazard of those advertisements hanging about.

~ Nutrition in Schools ~

It seems that our nation, as a whole, has gotten rounder and rounder over the past few decades. Many people theorize about the various causes. Personally, I don’t think it’s merely one cause…but many small no-no’s that have caused the larger problem to grow (if you’ll excuse the pun).

You’ve heard my previous rant about “quick-fix” diets or gadgets that claim to have an amazing remedy to your obese condition. Few ever actually do. But here, lately, the government has decided that instead of respecting the sovereignty of the parental figure(s) in an American home environment, they’re going to step into our shoes and become mandatory nutritionists for our children!

Granted, proper nutrition is one of the main keys of being physically healthy. And good intentions among nutritionists, government officials and some parents is commendable. But kids have been receiving unsolicited judgements about themselves from various sources for as long as there has been school. Hazing, bullying, theft, social exclusion… these are things kids have been tormented with for untold years. And now they’re being subjected not only to judgment by their piers…but by a governmental “fat test”. The BMI (body-mass-index) is taken each year and sent home to the parents. Why? Because the government feels that kids are being raised up in an unhealthy manner and they’re going to cost the American taxpayer millions of dollars in medical bills. I hate to be the bearer of suprising news to these governmental agencies on nutrition… but American’s have been eating whatever the heck we want to eat for many, many, many years. To suddenly impose this heavy burden of judgement on our young generation of kids is, at the very least, unfair.

I say that the agencies need to get their fingers out of our kids’ lunches and make school about Reading, Writing, Math, Science and History again!! This isn’t a health-spa… this is an educational institution!! Leave the nutritional aspects to us…the parents. We conceived them, raise them, feed them, clothe them and send them for an education… not a diet plan.

If government officials want to make a change, they can tighten up their OWN flabby bellies and stop eating high-priced, high-carb, restaurant meals and start chowing down on these new menu requirements they’ve slapped on our kids in the cafeterias. Let’s see how well the officials like drinking watered down, no-name fruit juice boxes instead of Starbucks Coffee and Cappuccinos. How about a tasteless, steamed veggie tray instead of that perfectly grilled porterhouse? No? I rest my case.

It’s sad that our children have to suffer humiliation and nutritional blandness just because our governor “Hollywood Huckabee” decided that Twinkies are bad and had a gastric bypass. Now “Mr. Skinny” is on a crusade to liberate us from our terrible eating habits…. whether we like it or not. He doesn’t give a rat’s ass about us, personally. He’s concerned about his presidential campaign chances, and about gaining national recognition for his stance on the American health issues topics.

Political ambition is a monstrous thing….isn’t it.

~ Participation Required ~

Anyone who frequents the internet is almost guaranteed to come across a banner or two like the one simulated below…



You might think that by successfully shooting the shark, you’ve just gotten yourself a Playstation 3! Wow! That’d be so cool! That was so…..easy.

Ah…easy, was it? Do you know how much a new Playstation 3 is going to retail for? Somewhere in the neighborhood of $600. And you believe that by clicking a red button and shooting a cartoon shark, someone is going to send you a brand new Playstation 3? Hrmm. Well, look down there in the lower right corner of that nifty little game you just played. See that microscopic text? It says, “Participation Required”. That’s the catch.

You see… the sly little marketing companies and their Flash animation artists have come to a meeting of the minds, you might say. They decided that you’re an idiot. Now don’t get offended….they think everyone is an idiot. They think that you’re too stupid to catch onto what they’re doing. They’re using a gimmick. What’s the gimmick? Why nothing other than manipulation of people’s perceptions and assumptions. If someone says, “I threw the ball”, you get the mental picture of a ball being thrown. If someone says, “I fell down”, you get the mental picture of someone tripping and crashing to the floor. Most people do, and therein lies the foundation for this particular marketing scheme.

If someone tells you, “Throw this rock in the pond and win $10,000”…you’d leap at the chance to throw the rock, right? What would you say if you threw the rock in, and didn’t get the money? I’ll bet you’d be pretty annoyed, right? Some of you would be downright mad. Ah, but did you read the rock? Yes…read the rock. You see, the rock said, “Participation in the upcoming footrace is required for a chance to win $10,000. An entry fee of $20 is required for the footrace, and a deposit of $10 is required for the mandatory footwear. If you win the footrace and do not appear at the winner’s stand in 20 seconds, you forfeit all winnings. The winner’s stand is 50 miles away.” Now, anybody with half a brain wouldn’t participate in such a silly offer, because it’s difficult and time consuming with a high probability of error on the participant’s part. Many chances to lose and few to win constitute a large portion of the “games” and “offers” out there on the net these days.

Let’s look at how the whole thing happens. You “assumed” that if you took the offer and threw the rock into the pond, you would get $10,000. Why didn’t you get the money? Because of misleading wordplay on the part of the marketer. Nowhere does it say “Throw this rock in the pond TO win $10,000”. That would imply that your successful action would grant you a reward.

By substituting the word “and”…they have played upon your assumptions. It’s actually two offers. “Throw this rock in the pond” and then “Win $10,000”. Throwing the rock does nothing more than get your attention. They want you to think that a small amount of your effort will gain you vast rewards. They’re trying to draw you in so they can get you to participate in the requirements for a chance at the $10,000. Why would they do this? Because sleazy companies who want to gain profits by any means possible will contract these marketers to do this.

They supply a prize…and require that you apply for their offers of credit cards, music memberships, discount buyers clubs, and all sorts of other mainly useless garbage. You waste all of your time and much of your money with these ridiculous offers…then you have to make sure you’re credited with participation in the offers (sometimes this hinges on you being granted credit, based on your credit rating). After this, you must send in the proper redemption forms with proof of participation…and then wait for them to honor their offer of the prize. Is all of that worth your attention to a stupid blinking button? I think not.

My public services, and rants, are done……for now. As always, more later.

Yes, yes… I know. Many of you think that my prolonged absence and lack of contribution to the blog could only mean one thing…. “He’s finally matured and has gone on to bigger and better things!” Not so! I’m still as childish, unstable, unpredictable and disgruntled as I ever was! So, just put those hopes aside. We’re about to leap into the abyss once more. (Aren’t you glad I’m so consistent?)

Today’s entry is sort of a hodge-podge mish-mosh of different little pet peeves of mine. It will consist of everything from “Previously Owned” to “Pepsi-fication” to “Highway Robbery at the Pump”. So grab a beverage of your choice and sit back, because you're in for a lengthy read.

- Previously Owned -

Oh merciful heavens! How many times have we been presented with this little automotive bubble-gum term? While I will expound on the redundancy of this terminology in a moment… I would be remiss not to also refer you to an already established commentary on the subject. It is provided by Foamy The Squirrel, (just click on "Cell Phones & Car Ads").... and I must warn my readers that it does contain adult language. Be that as it may, I would like to voice my agreement with his major points, thusly…

“Jason…”, you might ask, “…why is it that they don’t just called a used car a used car, anymore?” That’s a very good question, my little followers, and I’ll tell you why. You see, automobile dealerships try to put on a smoke-&-mirrors act in order to establish a comfortable emotional environment. They want to appear to each customer, as if he/she is the dealership’s most valued and important one.

Now, let’s address the history of the term, itself. Some years ago, a marketing research think-tank came up with the revelation that the word “used” might convey a sense of diminished quality. They concluded that the term “used” might cause the customer to see the potential purchase of such a vehicle as unwise. Why? Because it could mistakenly convey an underlying possibility of wear and diminished performance or quality. Therefore, regardless of the redundancy of the newly adopted term, they have established an industry-wide cliché of calling “used” cars “previously owned”.

If you want to get technical about the term “previously owned”, you must realize that every car is previously owned. How? Well, ownership is established by any person or persons who control a legal interest in the property that they hold. What this means is that, initially, the vehicle was owned by the manufacturer. Whoever created the vehicle owns it until they are paid for their labor and materials. After the vehicle is shipped to the dealership, it is given over into the care and protection of the dealership owner.

The dealership attempts to sell the vehicle to customers, but most customers don’t have $20,000-$40,000 burning a hole in their respective pocketbooks. Therefore, they typically arrange a vehicle loan from either a local financial institution (bank, credit union, etc) or they establish a loan through a specialized lending institution that caters to vehicle loans. The ownership of the vehicle now changes hands to the lien holder. Technically, neither of the “owners” thus far have “driven” or “used” the vehicle. They’ve merely transferred ownership of it.

YOU, the giddy consumer, are now the “user” of the vehicle in question. ((Technically, if you trailer the vehicle to your home and push it into the garage, making sure never to drive it, it cannot be called “used”. It’s just been “previously owned” prior to anyone else owning or using it.)) So we now see a definite breakdown in terminology that seems to have somehow been blended into a confusing and inaccurate advertisement gimmick. Now you can see how “previously owned” is a rather redundant term and an obvious condition of any vehicle, and “used” is more precise in its meaning.

- Pepsification -

I know you’re all sitting out there wondering where I came up with this word. No, it’s not in any dictionary or thesaurus. I just created it to more adequately describe the process by which Pepsico, Inc. is trying to monopolize and brainwash the major portion of southern restaurant chains and their patrons. You see, it’s becoming increasingly difficult and frustrating to many of us when we set out for a meal in town these days.

Nearly every place I go has a soda fountain, and most of them are stocked with a selection of Pepsi products. While I’m sure that there are some people residing in Arkansas that enjoy Pepsi products, with myself being a fan of at least one of them (Mt. Dew)… Pepsi Cola tastes somewhat akin to carbonated pancake syrup, in my humble opinion. Coca Cola far exceeds Pepsi Cola as far as taste goes. But, whether you personally prefer Pepsi or Coke isn’t the matter I’m addressing, per se.

I’m more concerned about the disturbing trend with restaurants that seem to cater ONLY to Pepsi products. Why isn’t Coca Cola being more aggressive in their attempt to keep a loyal fanbase happy by making sure that their products are also included at softdrink fountains in restaurants? After all, there is a Coca Cola distribution center in Little Rock, Arkansas for pete’s sake!! That should account for something!!

Not everybody likes Pepsi. I’d go so far as to wager that the percentage isn’t in favor of Pepsi in this area at all. But Pepsi keeps trying to monopolize the distribution in this area. Sponsorship of events… soda fountains… television advertisements… you name it.

Coke seriously needs to get on the ball, in my opinion. They’re letting lots of people become disappointed each time they sit down to a meal at a restaurant. I would think that it could be detrimental to their marketing strategy. But what do I know about marketing….

- Highway Robbery At The Pump -

I don’t think it’s any great news to people that the price of gasoline is hideously overblown to the point of ludicrousy. At what point can an industry justify the yo-yo effect of petroleum pricing, not on a weekly basis…not on a daily basis… but on an HOURLY basis now?? Filling stations are virtually at the point of needing a full time employee that’s hired merely to walk out with a suction pole and plastic numbers to continuously change the price of fuel.

While I’m sure OPEC has a lot to do with setting the price of crude oil, and the major refiners of the oil into usable gasoline add in their costs to this amount, I don’t understand why the price is in a constant and excruciatingly painful state of flux. America’s pocketbooks are screaming for mercy as our vehicles have to not only contend with the distances we drive, but with the task of keeping us cool in the midst of this oppressive heat wave that has swept the nation. We need a damn break… and SOON.

“Well, Mr. Opinionated Redneck, what would be YOUR solution to the crisis?”, you might be inclined to ask. I have a few alternatives…

#1) Citing the fact that we, as a nation, consume the vast majority of all products from oil-exporting nations throughout the world. I submit that we can set the price of any crude oil we buy. By having a monopoly on the percentage of consumption… any decline in our usage would spell disaster for the exporters.

The inherent problem with enacting this financial leverage and thereby establishing a much lower cost per barrel, lies in the fact that our daily demand for oil has become an absolute addiction and a necessary part of our economy. It is so much so, that we can’t even spare the reduced consumption rate enough to apply leverage to the supplier.

Without enough daily crude oil, our nation would grind to a halt. Therein lies our Achilles Heel. We have been blindly ignoring the undeniable need for an alternative abundant energy source for too many years now… and like all procrastinators tend to discover, it costs more in the long run to delay.

Conclusion: Implausible

#2) Tap our existing emergency stock of oil and open all exploration of existing domestic oilfields in order to give Americans a much needed and well deserved financial break from foreign oil. While we’re enjoying this relief, the government needs to do three vital things for the growth and prosperity of our nation.

A) Pull out of the middle-east and let the UN resolve the multi-national situation. We’ve had our fingers in their pie long enough, without any end in sight with regards to fighting. These people want to spend their lives arguing over Islamic fundamentalism and who’s got the most dirt and rocks. I say let them. They’re content on beheading each other and blowing each other up. Why should we continue to act like a referee when these people obviously don’t want to stop fighting?? Let them slug it out until their population is so decimated and meager that they can’t afford to fight anyone. Perhaps unconditional peace and cooperation between them will suddenly insue at that point.

B) Strengthen the protection of our nation’s borders through military reinforcement and maximize the security procedures in areas of transit by which potential enemies would gain access to our population.

C) Lastly, commit to the unconditional development of a dependable, abundant, clean and affordable energy alternative to crude oil… and actively integrate it into all facets of society in order to break our addiction to the genocidal jabbering towel-heads in the middle-east!!!! The sheiks don’t need another platinum-coated Rolls Royce.

Conclusion: Plausible, but unlikely

I’ve done my best at this point. Granted, my opinions and viewpoints may be askewed and biased, but hopefully this has been enough to get your mental juices flowing (if not boiling). If I’ve only done one thing today by writing this, I hope it’s that I’ve done my part as a concerned American citizen by voicing my Constitutionally guaranteed right to freedom of speech.

More later.

Well… as you might guess, it didn’t take long for something else to get on my nerves and qualify itself for a severe and merciless negative critique on my blog. Today’s melee will be targeted at fast food restaurants and their radio commercials. I hereby dub this entry as……

"Chew With Your Mouth Closed"

Many thousands of us have been told by our mothers not to talk when our mouth is full of food. It’s rude, nauseating, unattractive and unsanitary. Nobody wants to hear your saliva and mashed food sloshing and squishing around in your masticating mandibles whilst you attempt to toss out some supposedly important tidbit of information that couldn’t wait for a swallow.

However, certain unnamed fast food chains are using this horrendous practice to try and convey a sense of how delicious or irresistable their food is. The actors are crinkling wrapping paper…rattling cups of drink…and filling their mouths with all manner of wet and squishy food items while they carry on some manner of dialogue about how good the food is and how great the deal is at “restaurant X”.

The only way it could sound any more offensive, is if they somehow began to suck mucus through coffee straws on air. What has advertising come to these days?!? I say the answer is for these people to stop talking while chewing. Advertise your restaurant…plug your hot items…boast about the taste! But stop making us listen to wet, sloppy mouth sounds. If anything, you’re making people want to visit the toilet…rather than your place of business.

My work is done here. More later.

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Well howdy there, kiddos! I see you all have your snacks and drinks ready. Are we all set for yet another shrieking plummet into the dark abyss of my mental synapses? It’s gonna be a deep one…

Fasten your seatbelts and keep any rational expectations of social conformity inside the car at all times. I claim no responsibility for them being sheared off by sharp words or cutting commentary. So, without further adieu…this installment is entitled:

The Politically Correct
~ or ~
A Nation Suffering with Cranial Rectosis

Ohhh you knew I was getting around to this, didn’t you? But of course! It’s time to hack off, peeve, annoy, disenchant, offend and generally irritate the mumbling masses of nervous and trembling “politically correct” within our society with a little bit of harsh honesty and unbridled redneck commentary.

For far too long we have been spoon-fed a slow but steady meal of mass-media-enhanced mental conditioning horse-####. It stems from how the “Powers that Be” feel we (as a society) ought to embrace and handle certain issues. Whether it’s our moral view on people’s sexual orientation or our views on Spanish being popularly adopted as our second national language…Political Correctness has been, hands down, the biggest contributor to the loss of social individualism in recorded history.

Why do I think that? I’ll tell you why. It’s because we have allowed the fear of offending other people’s sensibilities to utterly and completely infest every aspect of our lives and social thinking. It’s to the point now, where cartoons that have been accepted and aired for over 50 years are now being censored for content suddenly deemed “inappropriate” due to PC issues with certain races. Tolerance for non-confrontational racial humor and stereotypes in mass media (in any form) are at their all-time lowest point.

Why can we, as a nation, not recognize and understand our individualism? These days it seems that we’re afraid to be one nation of separate, but equal races. We will continue to be plagued by racism and the fear of Political Correctness until we, as a people, stop trying to meld ourselves into a dysfunctional mass of “supposed” blended uniformity. There is beauty in all races of humanity. We are not all the same culturally, and shouldn’t be. Diversity is our most beautiful aspect, as a nation. Uniformity is an utter bore.

Political Correctness has also told us that all dark-skinned people within the United States are no longer just Americans. No. They’ve all suddenly been descriptively lumped together into a laughably ridiculous designation popularly known today as, “African-Americans”. Oh my dear merciful heavens…what have we come to?

I’m sorry, but every person of the darker persuasion does not have an ancestral link to Africa. Some are Haitian-Americans… others are Jamaican-Americans… etc. etc. etc. You see my point. I don’t believe that we, as a people, have a right to claim ourselves as anything but “American” when we are either born into this nation or naturalized through legal immigration. It does not matter the country of our ancestral origin. We are Americans, first and foremost. Personally, I find it to be nothing more than a big steaming pile of racially motivated crap with nobody but the NAACP benefiting from it. It’s hollow, meaningless, trite and absurd. I suppose, if you want to get technical about the PC-version of what I am…. I might be considered a Euro-Native American.

If anyone had a right to insist upon a differentiating terminology for their particular race, it would be the native peoples of this land. Their nations were decimated, mercilessly, and without justification. All of it was done for nothing more than greed for riches and land. These people were also enslaved, tortured, separated, re-educated, deculturalized and brainwashed. But the nations that remain are still proud.

They are not whiners, nor seekers of specialized social status, because they are mature of mind. They have my profound respect and admiration for their strength and dignity. I have ancestry in both European and Native blood. I could easily start up a tangent-rant about how ridiculous this country has been about the whole “Indian” terminology since it inception… but I won’t. It would do little good, and this blog entry is already resembling War & Peace, by size alone.

I am not a bigot, nor a racist, nor a white supremacist, nor a skin-head, nor a neo-nazi, nor a member of any other organized hate-group. However, I am tired of having the tired old story of racial prejudice being rammed down the throats of the white segment of this nation’s populous over every damn issue that might even remotely portray a black American in the slimmest of negativity. Face it… wrong is wrong, regardless of race. If you’re busted doing something wrong…skin color doesn’t matter. Stop whining about it and march to jail. You are now no longer white, tan, red, yellow or black… you are ORANGE.

And if you think that racial stereotyping and prejudice causes more and more black Americans to show up on the evening news, you need an education. You need only look at the literally staggering percentage of black, poverty stricken youths who would rather sell illegal drugs, join gangs and take their chances against law enforcement rather than graduate high school and/or college. Statistically, there are more black people in America currently suffering in poverty-stricken areas than any other racial segment of the populous. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to deduce that you’re going to see more crime being committed by black citizens. It isn’t racial targeting… it’s merely the inevitable result of statistical percentages!

That being said, let me summarize this whole speech with this final thought for you people. It’s been said that beauty is only skin deep but ugly runs clean to the bone. But I submit to you, that the worst kind of ugly is that of the racially narrow-minded with their personal cultural agendas. And the beauty beneath a skin color comes from dignity in their diversity, with compassion and understanding toward other races.

There… is where beauty and ugliness truly lies. Within the cultural choices we consciously make as a people and in how we treat one another.

Peace, yall.

I know it seems like I’m having more and more to say about subject matters these days. And, perhaps, this is a good thing…or maybe it’s bad. Who’s to say? At any rate, I thought I would share these few odd thoughts and ponderances. Perhaps you’ll agree.

Perhaps you’ll merely scratch your head and wonder, once more, why I haven’t already been admitted to a psychiatric ward. I’m the first one to admit that some of my thoughts….well…ok, MOST of my thoughts are not mainstream in origin. Too much of the non-conformist gene in me, I suppose. But, without further delay, here it is.

Have you ever stopped to wonder about how businesses seem to have this innate “right” or “permission” to slap any and all operational costs on the buying public so they can dismiss any worry of it? Think about it. Imagine there’s a business called “XYZ Service - We keep America Zipped!”. Ok, XYZ has just found out that the government has imposed a new monitoring fee on their services. This means that each month, XYZ will have to pay close to $500 to state government in order to operate legally. The board of directors at XYZ determines that this fee will cut into their profits, and we all know how important it is to squeeze every penny of profit out of us as customers.

How can they avoid disruption of their regular income? Easy. They merely pass this cost along to their customers in the form of a “Fee” listing on their monthly billing statement. We’ve all seen these tiny little enigmatic charges and fees on our utilities and monthly subscription service invoices. But why do businesses have the right to stick US with THEIR costs?? Answer: Because there’s no law against it. And there should be one. Businesses get away with this because there’s no legislation that says a business must pay its own costs and fees if it provides a monthly service to customers.

If you’ve ever taken a close look at your itemized cell phone bill, you’ll see a whole slew of charges for every little fee and cost under the sun. That’s because, as a mobile phone service provider, your cell phone company must pay all manner of usage taxes and charges mandated not only by the state they’re operating in…but also for the country they’re operating in. This would cost them MILLIONS per year if they absorbed the cost, themselves. That’s simply not going to happen.

No, they’re going to divvy that cost up among all of their customers who are locked into a 2-year service contract (which means, kiddies, that you’re now bent over the proverbial stump…and I hope you brought lube). Yes, there’s state fees, state taxes, federal fees, federal taxes, sales tax and probably a paper bill fee (so they can recover the costs of mailing you the bill in the first place). Yes….they’re that lame and greedy.

There needs to be legislation enacted on a federal basis, which would require these cell phone companies to absorb some of their own costs. Fundamentally, what they’re doing is wrong. Oh yes, they’re making it easier to gain profits by “passing the buck”. But why should it be OUR responsibility to pay THEIR bills? We’re already paying our own.

Just something to think about, the next time you’re writing out that check for your monthly services.

Today’s commentary about life in general will be two-fold in design. It’s value packaging!! Two…two…two rants for the space of one! What will I think of next?? Zow-wee!

Ok, enough of that. I’m going to be addressing both the new Arkansas Clean Indoor Air Act of 2006…and the state law (HB 1739) which mandates the use of headlights when windshield wipers are in operation.

So, without further adieu… here’s my take on the smoking law. The Arkansas Clean Indoor Air Act of 2006 (Also called ACT 8) basically says that all employers with three (3) or more employees are subject to this law. All enclosed buildings where less than ½ of the building is considered to be doorways must be smoke-free. Fines can range anywhere from $1000 to $1500 per violation.

Now…. Before you assume that I am against being healthy, let me state that I have been smoke-free for almost a year now. I enjoyed smoking because it was relaxing and pleasant to me. However, it was also killing me and posing severe risks to the health of those around me. For not only the preservation of my own life, but that of my friends and family, I chose to quit. But that’s not going to stop me from ranting against this absurd law.

I’m sure it was constructed with the best of intentions, and that there are as many (if not more) supporters and backers of this law than there are those opposed to it. I can’t help but feel that this is, once again, a blatant overstepping of government into its citizens’ personal human rights. Employers should be “allowed” to enact laws governing the permission to smoke within their privately owned places of business, but should not be subjected to state laws which may hinder establishments specifically designed to accommodate those who choose to smoke. Bars and pubs, billiard halls, and certain restaurants derive income from patrons who might otherwise not visit if their choice to smoke either before or after a meal was taken from them.

I fully realize the fundamental truth behind the health risks of second-hand smoke. I also fully recognize the rights of non-smoking individuals to breathe clean air in businesses. This is not an argument against the health-conscious citizens. I’m merely saying that employers should be allowed to weigh the risks of allowing employees and/or patrons to smoke inside their businesses on a case by case basis. Not because some set of legislators decided that we need to have our behaviors policed in the interest of overall well-being. This doesn’t adequately reflect an accurate overall majority view of this issue, in my opinion.

Take, for example, my place of business. Many shop workers are also smokers. This is their choice. But due to this new law, it is now regulated that all indoor enclosures are non-smoking areas, subject to fines and penalties if this law is violated. The workers argue that they are exposed to far worse airborne substances than mere cigarette smoke. Paint fumes…fuel vapors….welding fumes…smoke from metal oils burning away. Cigarette smoke is a drop in the bucket. Yet, they’re being subjected to local government saying, “We know better than you. Just do as we tell you or pay the price.”

Individual, basic, human rights are at the very core of the values we should cherish. While we, as a society, should be conscious and mindful of the equally basic human rights of our fellow man…we should also realize that we should not be told what is best for us. We’re adults. Our government was designed to be “Of the people, By the people & For the People”. I don’t recall hearing this matter being presented to “The People” for a majority vote. No… it was a legislative matter governed by elected representatives who, themselves, didn’t bother to put the matter up to a majority vote among their own constituents.

I have a prediction that this Law will eventually be amended and/or reconstructed as protests and viable arguments about its all-encompassing and biased construction come to light.

Now we take a little stroll down the line to a much more commonplace, everyday type issue. I know you’ve all seen them. I’ve seen them…sometimes almost too late to avoid them. Yes, we are talking about these moronic, booger-eatin’ abortions of commonplace logic. They, for some unknown reason, choose to not only dismiss any thought for their own safety… but inherently endanger every fellow driver on the road. By stubbornly refusing to use either their headlights, their wipers, or both…during inclement weather… they shroud their vehicles in road-spray and the curtain of dark gray rain that permeates the roadways. This makes it difficult for them to see us, but it’s twice as hard to see THEM.

Why, one must wonder, is it so difficult to activate two switches when they encounter rain? If a driver has no respect for his or herself, that’s one thing. But, if for no other reason than the prevention of serious and life-threatening accidents, they need to respect other innocent drivers and use their lights and wipers!!

There’s no other excuse than simple, unadulterated laziness on their part. And I, for one, am tired of seeing them zipping down the interstate like a big gray cloud, oblivious to anyone or anything but their own agenda.

The law was enacted to try to curb this dangerous and thoughtless behavior. But, I have yet to hear of anyone or see anyone ticketed for this. With the threat of rain looming on the horizon for central Arkansas today, I’m sure these inconsiderate, knuckle-draggin’ bastards will be out in force once again.

New feature on the blog: Stupid Word Of The Day
Gubernatorial - No truer terminology could be associated with a political race of any kind. They're all goobers.

More later...of course.

In the spirit of the blog, and in an attempt at fostering similar angst and frustration with “the system” in my readers… I have chosen to address and target the marketing media once again for this installment.

Today’s misguided and scrutiny ridden tryst down into my dysfunctional mindset is geared toward the marketing media’s attempt to “disarm” or “numb” the buying public. Ah yes, word play which is created for nothing else than to downplay the grotesquely absurd price tag totals of today’s mostly useless, vain, and poorly fabricated trinkets in the malls and shopping centers of America.

I speak, of course, about the two words which are obviously a marketing MUST when attempting to persuade “John Q. Public”. These two words are….

JUST and ONLY

Look upon them carefully, people. See them for what they really are. Deception and disarmament, incarnate. No more contradictory terms could be applied to the majority of prices on merchandise than these two profoundly misleading terms. They are constantly used in an attempt to befuddle and downplay our sensibilities of what we know to be a decent asking price for any given piece of merchandise that these two words are splashed onto.

Why am I up at arms about two mere words? Because the sheer stupidity behind their usage is at the very core of this rant. Consider this, if you will… If you were to be in need of a stick of underarm deodorant. What might you suggest the price to be? $2.00? Perhaps $5.00? Who’s to say what brand you use? Ah, but what if you were to stumble across a rack of deodorant that displayed a large, fluorescent explosion sticker that boldly announced that the price of Brand-X Deodorant was ONLY $12.99 EACH!!!

I know what you’re thinking. “Right. Who would pay $12.99 for a stick of deodorant?” And you’re completely correct in your thinking. It’s absurd. But nonetheless, the words JUST and ONLY are constantly being splashed across every thinkable advertising gimmick known to mankind. No matter the cost, no matter the merchandise… the common thinking amongst the retailers must be centered around the chance that these two words will somehow dupe us into equating the quality and need for the product with that of it’s ridiculous price!

I, for one, am not fooled. Nor am I amused by it. It’s become a sickening and annoying sight. Check any newspaper…any billboard…any TV advertisement. ONLY $19.99…. JUST $500…

And if these aren’t enough, you’ve got to love UNDER. Ah yes, UNDER. “Buy this garden cart for under $100!!!” However, with the discovery that the cost of the cart is $99.99 … one tends to find their expectations of a legitimate and opportunistic bargain to be dashed against the rocks of disappointment once more. The very idea. All done in a bid to avert your eyes from a competitor’s shallow bargain just long enough to disgust you with their own shallow bargain. UNDER…… the very idea.

And while we’re on this little band wagon of spite… why not address the teeth-grinding experience of enduring yet another REBATE?

Oh for pete’s sake…who came up with this bastardization of comsumer relations??? Why must we endure this constant enslaught upon our intelligence by corporations bound and determined to capitalize upon every penny they can squeeze out of us? What ever happened to valuing the people who guarantee your profits by thinking of their interests? No, let’s bind ourselves to the rest of the greedy corporations by including an offer with a rebate!

We’ll offer an unheard of low price for a popular retail item…then confuse and fluster the hell out of our consumers by complicating every aspect of the rebate with “qualifying conditions”, “waiting periods”, “mailing deadlines” and “10 to 12 week” processing times. Not only this, but let’s engineer our conditions so that any error made by the consumer on the rebate claim form will cause him or her to default on the rebate due to mail delivery time. By the time they’re notified of the error and can send in a corrected form, the time period for their claim has now expired. Oh my aren’t we smart!

Not only will we make it nigh unto impossible to weed through all of this confusion without error… but we’ll play on the innate tendencies of the average human being to not want further complications in their life. Most people would rather lose the discount rather than suffer the headache of going through these steps, so we’re almost guaranteed not to have to honor our rebate offer! Oh delight and joy!

How much more of a red-tape anal rape can you devise? Rebates ought to be outlawed. If you wanna offer Brand-X phone at a promotional discounted price… grant an “instant” rebate. Let the retailer deal with recovering their money from the manufacturer. Gain the public’s trust and satisfaction by granting them the lowered price…period. No gimmicks. No hoops to jump through. Just a promotional low price.

Alright… I’ll go take my medication now and find my happy place. Good day.

Ok…it’s obviously time for another entry into the ol’ blog. We finally did the whole camping thing over the July 4^th holiday weekend. We headed down to Lake DeGray near Arkadelphia, Arkansas and set up camp at DeRouche Campground. Although we experienced some rainy conditions toward the end of our stay, including some rather muggy and humid conditions, we had a good time overall.

We had the opportunity to camp in our new tent, and experience the frustration of a leaky air-mattress…but it was still fun. The nights were fairly cool next to the lake because of the cool breeze we got off the water. We took a box fan, so that helped. We didn’t catch many fish, but we ate what we caught. It was mostly hand-sized or smaller perch. No catfish or bass to be had in the shallow lakeside areas.

We took a guided sunset lake tour by boat, which was fun. We ate at the local CrackerBarrel restaurant one morning for breakfast, so that was a pleasant change from cold cereal. Oh, we’d brought biscuits and bacon and whatnot…but our friends’ camper oven was giving us fits. We did manage to get some pancakes fixed up toward the end of the trip, tho.

We were befriended by several ducks and their ducklings due to the copious amounts of bread crumbs the women were tossing out. Free food = winged visitors.

Here are a few pics from the trip....

I’ve begun to notice a widely accepted and predatory practice among business who are attempting to lure customers into their contract services. It’s called… the FREE TRIAL PERIOD.

It’s almost as bad as the whole FREE* issue. The difference lies in the fact that you are presented with every outward indication that this particular business is offering a trial period of service for you to evaluate your satisfaction with the product or service. What’s actually happening, is that a much more complex and risky deal is being hidden beneath a flashy advertising gimmick. What they’re really doing is attempting to play upon the natural human instinct of curiosity, desire, and forgetfulness in order to derive a profit.

Most “free trials” quickly end up annoying their potential clients because the simple exterior quickly peels away as soon as interest is shown. Let’s create a theoretical offer and I’ll demonstrate.

“New SuperTech3000 cellular phone offer! It allows you to make calls even while underwater!! 14-DAY FREE TRIAL! Hurry! Supplies are limited!”

You think, “Oh cool! I don’t know why I’d try to call someone from underwater…but that’s pretty cool. I’ll try it for 14 days and see if it’s worth the money.” Ah…will you now? Alrighty. You decide to contact this company and get yourself a SuperTech3000 for 14 days.

Oh! What’s this? You suddenly find out that the phone is $500, and requires either a yearly or monthly subscription for service. If you want the 14-day free trial…you have to give them your credit card information so they can bill your stupid butt if you happen to get forgetful enough not to cancel your subscription before the 14 days are up.

This is called the “ring through the nose”… if you don’t unclip the chain before 14 days pass…you are at the mercy of their contract. Oh are these people lovely? Wouldn’t you recommend them to everyone? If you participate in anything emblazoned with a “FREE” attached to the sign, you had best beware.

People are not in business to be kind to you, cater to your whims, do you favors or give out free things. Free…is never free. Free…is a way to get you to pay. Remember this, people. You’ll thank me for it.

Bottom line? If you can’t resist the “free trial period”….then invest in a memo book. Just because you’ve forgotten about Company X…doesn’t mean they’ve forgotten about you.

I’m outta here for now.

Upon relating my absent-minded behavior of the prior evening to a dear friend of mine, she insisted that I publicly and shamelessly indignify myself to the world by posting what happened, here….on my blog.

Are you feelin’ the love? I know I am. In the spirit of good sportsmanship, and as a testament to the fact that we all occasionally try to shove our heads up our respective posterior orifices… here is my story.

In preparation for the upcoming camping trip on Friday, my dear wife stopped by her mom’s house to pick up a brand new family sized tent that had been in storage for some time. My mother-in-law had won it at a raffle or whatnot some time back, but didn’t really have much use for it… so now it has become ours. New + Free = Happy Jason.

At any rate, the wifey and I had the foresight to pre-assemble the tent at the house prior to getting all the way down to our campsite and finding out that something was wrong or missing. As luck would have it, everything works like a charm! After assembling the tent and checking out all of the neat little gadgets included with our high-tech-portable-hut….I was informed that supper was ready, and to come inside the house. This is where the insult to intelligence began…

You see, there are two mesh pockets provided within the tent to place belongings in. This keeps sharp objects and loose personal effects from rolling around the floor of the tent (which can cause injury to the user or the tent itself, if rolled on or trampled on). There are also a few utility loops sewn into the walls as well. It was on one of these little loops that I clipped my car keys, so as not to lay on them when we went inside to inspect our little mansion.

They were left hanging in the tent when I went inside. After supper, I cleaned the kitchen up and told the dear wife that I was going to pack the tent back up and put it inside the tote bag it came in. I disassembled the tent, stakes, bow rods, rain fly, and equipment loft. I packed everything up nice and neat, and she helped me roll up the tent and pack it away. Everything tucked into the tote nice and neat.

Well……yesterday, at some point, our illustrious and infallible power company provided us with a nice power blink. I noticed, upon my arrival home, that everything that plugged into a wall and which possessed a digital clock…was blinking the “eternal 12:00” hour. At bedtime, I set the clock at my bedside to the proper time (mainly because I’ve neglected to replace the backup battery several times now due to forgetfulness.) and set my alarm to wake me up at 5:30am….or so I thought.

At approximately 6:00am, my wife wakes me and informs me of the time. I typically leave the house no later than 6:30 in order to arrive at work before 7:00am (clock in time). So, this gave me only 30 minutes (versus the hour I’d planned for) to get ready. All went fine and I was ready to start my truck….but where were my keys?

I looked high and low…retraced my steps….checked everywhere I typically lay my keys (as the clock ticked). I looked in my dad’s shop, my office, key rack, kitchen counter, bathroom, bedroom…nothing.
Well, it was now 6:30am and time to leave. Still no keys. Then it hit me. Could I have been that forgetful? The answer would soon come to me.

I had been asked not to wake my dear wife when I left for work today, because she had been given a day off from work as a “thank you” for putting in valuable time at her job. I’d already forced her to wake ME up this morning from me obviously setting the alarm for pm instead of am. Now I was about to wake her again by having to rustle through a folded up tent. I did…and she asked me what in the hell I was doing.
After telling her, she shook her head and let me continue my search.

I found them, still attached to the loop inside the tent, and promptly set off for my truck. I arrived and clocked in…at 7:04am. Granted, it’s a Tuesday… but it’s the second “Monday” of the week for me. As the great Paul Harvey says…

“And now you know…the rest…of the story.”

It’s been awhile since my last entry, so I reckon I better make quota huh? ~lol~ Well, let’s seeeee…what’s been goin on…

At long last, the camping trip is a “go”. We’re going to be camping on scenic Lake DeGray for the July 4th weekend. We’ll be leaving out this coming Friday to meet our friends down at the camp site. We’re doing the tent-thing and they’re bringing their tag along camper. I found out rather quickly that mid to early-70’s campers were NOT designed for 6’-7” hillbillies… the ceiling is at about neck level for me. So, if I go in there, there’ll be a lot of stooping going on.

I’m sure most of our time will be spent outside in lawn chairs or at the water. The only things that historically drive people inside their RV’s or campers are swarms of bugs, intense heat, or thunderstorms. I’m hoping we don’t experience any of the above.

This weekend was all about visiting our friends, setting plans in place, and getting their camper spiffy for the trip. I volunteered to help, but there wasn’t enough room for everyone to be inside the camper cleaning. My wife’s pretty short, so it was easier for her to get around inside the camper… and Chris pretty much had the outside covered, as far as a bleach-wash on any mildew.

I busied the kiddos with some ATV rides and video games. I worked on some of my Genealogy and grilled some hotdogs for supper. It was a good weekend. This week I have to concentrate on getting a fishing license and getting my truck’s tags renewed. Wouldn’t make for a very good camping trip if I got pulled over for expired tags….now would it?

Speaking of my Genealogy hobby… I’ve got several things in the fire at the moment. One of my ancestors supposedly owned a mobile sawmill and cut lumber for a local lumber company back in the 1920’s. I’ve asked a lady at the local historical museum if she’d look through some of her old photographs of that time period and see if (by some chance) my ancestor might be featured with that mobile sawmill. I’m sure I’ll be hearing back from her around mid-week… so I have my fingers crossed. I have a picture of his wife…but not one of him. He’d be my great-great-grandfather.

I also have trips planned to two southern Arkansas towns in the near future. I need to do some microfilm searches and land record searches on the earliest ancestor I have on record, to date. He was born in Tennessee around 1789. That would put his father’s lifetime right in the period of the American Revolutionary War. I’m hoping to get past this “data roadblock” I’ve been experiencing…and hopefully gain some information on his parents. I wonder if they were immigrants from the Old Country at that point, or if my lineage can be dated back to the pilgrims? These are the kinds of possibilities that keep me searching. It’s like a mystery novel…and each chapter holds new clues, and new discoveries. All I have to do is be persistent, dedicated, and crafty. Oh, and there’s the whole “extremely lucky” aspect that tends to help out at times when there’s nothing to go on.

I guess I’d better take a break from writing for now…. I have some work to get done. Gotta pay bills, ya know. As always… more later.

Ok folks… it’s time to ponder a question that’s been annoying me for a long time now. Acronyms. Note, that acronyms are not to be confused with abbreviations. Merriam-Webster’s Online Dictionary defines the word “abbreviation” as follows:

ab·bre·vi·a·tion: n. 1) the act or result of abbreviating : ABRIDGMENT 2) a shortened form of a written word or phrase used in place of the whole

So, an abbreviation is a shortened or truncated version of a larger word it represents. However, an acronym is something of a different color:

ac·ro·nym: n. 1) a word (as NATO, radar, or snafu) formed from the initial letter or letters of each of the successive parts or major parts of a compound term; also : an abbreviation (as FBI) formed from initial letters : INITIALISM

I bring this subject to light due to my observance (and subsequent resulting annoyance) of its continuous and somewhat absurdly grotesque overuse. It seems like everything has its own acronym these days. It’s especially true with regards to commercial advertisements for anything medical. Medical terminology basically consists of nothing BUT acronyms for every disease, treatment, body part, drug and billing procedure involved in the healing of human beings.

What’s wrong with the original word or words? Are they too long to pronounce with any form of dignity by the general populous? Is it an effort to confound the consumer with enigmatic truncations so that they will mindlessly assume that they don’t need to know the words associated with the acronym? Perhaps the medical community figures that by complicating an already dizzying series of Latin words into jumbled up acronyms, they will be more easily remembered?

One that seems to proliferate the television and radio these days is acronymed as “E.D.” ED stands for “erectile dysfunction”. A layman's explanation of this is that: “the ol’ penis ain’t doin what it’s supposed to be doin as well as it used to do it.” As a result, the medical community has capitalized on this wide-spread psychological, medical, or stress-induced state of sexual trouble with a catchy little acronym. It’s most likely a ridiculous and uselessly chivalrous attempt to protect us from some kind of assault upon our delicate moral sensibilities by the avoidance of uttering “erectile dysfunction”. But in an age of Real World, Dukes of Hazzard going Rated-R in the movies, and even so-called “childrens shows” having crudely disguised inuendo humor in them… what could we possibly be offended by in the term “erectile dysfunction”??

For pete’s sake, people… it took nearly 6 months before Rogaine would tell us what the hell they were providing a treatment FOR! Why would we pay money to go and see a damn doctor and inquire whether Rogaine was right for us… if we had no idea if it was a possible treatment for cateracts, bunions, hemmorhoids or baldness?? I assume it was out of pure luck or process of elimination that some poor sap with a receeding hairline finally was told was Rogaine DID…and then he spread the word. Talk about an advertising guffaw. Sure, it got the name out there… but how stupid does a company look when everyone knows the name of its product…and over 3/4 of those people don’t know what it’s used for…then probably only 1/4 of the 3/4 would even benefit from it if they knew? Very odd.

But, back to what I was saying… Acronyms. They’re everywhere. Think about it. USA… MPH… STP… OBGYN… LOL... YIM... MSN... XP... S/M/L/XL... PDA… PDF… PDQ… CST… ED…CAT Scan... AWOL…. DT&L… BLT… AT&T…. SBC…. SLT… DOA… R/T… GT… GTO… GTA… MP… AP…CD/CDR/CDRW…. RAM… ROM… CPU…. MPG… AM/FM... JPG…. GIF…. NBC… CBS…ABC… WTC…. WMDs…. AM/PM… AC/DC… ASAP…. it just goes on and on and on. You can probably think of a dozen that I haven’t mentioned yet. The system smothers you with cryptic acronyms for every damn thing under the sun these days. And why? So they can save money on text? So they can be trendy? Who knows. It just seems rather excessive to me.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I believe I’m going to fix a BLT and a frosty A&W, then enjoy some R&R by watching some MST3K.

TTFN!!